“Rub a monkey's tummy with your head!”
Jane Smith's catchphrase
Jane Smith was a student in Mrs Drazil's class 26 years ago. In the chapter "The Blue Notebook," Dee Dee finds a note from Jane Smith to Mrs Drazil. The note says she is moving away and won't be completing any of the last twelve pieces of homework. In the note she tells Mrs Drazil to "Rub a monkeys tummy with with your head."
We next hear from Jane in the chapter "Open Wide". In this chapter we discover that Jane Smith, (now known as Dr Payne), is Jason's dentist. It says she has long fingers and even longer fingernails.
In the chapter "Jane Smith", we discover she made a lot of money from being a dentist and lives in a mansion with her husband Sham Payne and her dog Brussel and her cat Sprouts.
One evening, Jane and Sham are visited by Mrs Drazil at their mansion, much to Jane's horror. Jane tries to make a quick escape in a motorboat with Mrs. Drazil in hot pursuit in a rowboat. Neither of them was ever seen again. The last thing Jane said was "Rub a monkey’s tummy with your heaaaaaaaaaa . . ."
Jane is very greedy and loves money even more than her husband. We discover in the chapters "Open Wide" and "Jane Smith" that she often drills teeth that don't need to be treated, in order to make extra money. In the chapter "The Blue Notebook," we learn that Jane hates homework and loves to brag about not doing it.
She is Sham Payne's wife and Jason's dentist in the book. We also know that Jane was a former student in Mrs Drazil's class and that they had a bad relationship because Jane never did her homework.
- Her husband's name is a pun on the word "champagne", while her two pets' names are a pun on the word "Brussels sprouts".